8 things that I have learned in 8 years of marriage

marriage, wedding, wedding rings

Eight years ago, I married the man of my dreams. Ok, hold up, I can't say that he was the man of my dreams- that's some fine actor- but I can say that he is my equal in every way. He is such a great husband, an amazing father, and so much more. I mean, I'm a little difficult at times, and this man can take everything I throw at him- AND he still loves me! That right there is true love, folks!

So in the past eight years, I have learned some really valuable lessons about marriage...

1. When they say "for better or worse", it ain't no joke

In marriage there are A LOT of really good times, but there are also some really low times. Personally, I have depression, and my husband is awesome at understanding me. Whenever I am having a really low day, he knows how to perk me up. If I get sick, he is right there to try and make me feel better. When he had back surgery, I did the same thing. Yes, you can be happy within a marriage, but the one thing that will really define your marriage is how you both react in that low part. 

Just remember: Happiness is over rated, but love is not. 

2. Marriage is definitely a 50/50 thing

Every married person will tell you that marriage is a 50/50 thing, and I am going to say the same thing. No person can do everything 100% of the time. You need to rely on each other- emotionally and household wise. When it comes to chores, don't be afraid to ask for help. Do not, and I repeat, do not assume that the other person will just know what you need help with. Stop thinking that right now! 

3. Communicate, because no one is right ALL THE TIME

Pride is a funny thing when it comes to marriage. Both people want to be right, and neither wants to admit that they were wrong. If you are fighting over some dumb, stupid thing, then stop and communicate each other's ideas. Suck up your pride and be adults about decisions. After all, you married that person for a reason, right?

You are in a marriage- not on a debate team!

4. Have fun with each other

Marriage gets boring if you can't have fun with your spouse. I can't even tell you how much fun I am able to have with my husband, and that it most likely the KEY reason that we have lasted so long (been together almost 10, but married for 8). We are friends. Sure we don't always like the same things, but we do enjoy each other's company. He deals with my incessant need for selfies and blog pictures, and I deal with his love of restoring vices to their original glories. We make jokes, share funny videos on Facebook with each other, and more. 

5. It's ok not to be in love 100% of the time

I will be the first to admit that in the past eight years, I have not been in love 100% of the time. Yes, I love my husband, but I haven't been totally in love with him. But that is ok, because then he did something that made me fall in love with him all over again. Like when I saw him hold our son for the first time. 

That's the fun part- falling in love with your spouse over and over again.

6. Make time for each other

The thing about marriage is the fact that you kinda need to spend some quality time together; and I am not talking about the time that you spend with the kids watching a movie. I am talking about the time that you spend just the two of you. Sure, date nights are cool and all, but if your schedules conflict, then a quick coffee at Starbucks or even a lunch date while the kids are in school are the best. 

7. Put yourself in the other person's shoes

Sometimes we are wrapped up in our own personal lives, that we forget what it our partner is going through. Life can be frustrating and more often than not, our partners rely on us to be the crying shoulder. Sure, it can get annoying when they are always complaining about work, but wouldn't you want them to listen if you needed to complain about work? Or maybe being a stay at home mom is stressful, so they need to vent. That is the time to man/woman up and put yourself in their shoes. Or maybe just listen.

8. ALWAYS be yourself

Sometimes when people are dating, they never really get to see the "other" side of the person they are dating, and then that side will most often come out once they get married. I've learned that sometimes, you need to embrace who you are and rely on the fact that your significant other loves you for you, and not what you look like, dress like, live like, etc. Marriage is about loving the other person so much that you could never live without them. 

The past eight years has gone by way too fast for me... and I can't wait for eight more. <3

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marriage, wedding

1 comment

  1. Happy Anniversary! May there be many more happy years to come.


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