I've been a parent for all of a little over five years, and have learned some valuable lessons about life. Today I am here to tell you about ten ways that the cult of parenting changes you... cause you know how they say that going to prison changes a person, well so does parenting...
one | You learn that personal space is a thing of the past
And pooping with the door open is perfectly acceptable.
two | You discover new stores
And they are full of children's clothes.
three | You learn a whole new language
Other than the normal goo goo ga-ga, once that little bundle of joy gets to the age of understanding regular human talk, you and your significant other learn to speak in code... aka spelling everything.
four | Smelling another human's booty becomes second nature
And perfectly acceptable.
five | Your fridge goes through some major changes
Fresh fruit, formula, and healthy child friendly snacks replace your alcohol and junk food.
six | Friday nights are no longer spent drinking with friends.
They are spent cuddling on the couch with a mini me, watching whatever animated show they are obsessed with.
seven | Your taste in movies change
Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, Handy Manny, and Paw Patrol replace Inception, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, and Halloween on the DVD shelf.
eight | Your schedule now revolves around nap time
And you count down the minutes until you can actually walk without a mini me wedged up your ass.
nine | Alcohol no longer comes in brown bottles that are sold as a six pack
It comes in a glass bottle, and you have to drink it out of a glass.
Wine. I'm talking about wine.
ten | You realize that there is someone more important that you.
And that you would do anything to keep them safe or make them happy.
Are you a parent? How has parenting changed you?
*Linking up with September Farm
Always say yes to the wine.