an open letter to all my future interviewers

Dear Sir or Madam:

Thank you so much for inviting me for an interview, in the hopes to work with your company. In this economy, it's really tough to get a job nowadays, and even harder to obtain an interview. Considering how many individuals must have applied for this position I am interviewing for, you must have seen something in my resume/application that made you pick up that phone and invite me. For that, I am indebted to you. 

During our interview, you will most likely make small talk and ask me a lot of questions. I found the place ok- even though I probably had to do a drive by the day before and double check the GPS the day of- and then rush out the door to make it at least fifteen minutes early. No matter my health, I will always answer that I am feeling great- even though I may feel a migrane coming on. 

I will be the first one to admit that I have been on quite a few interviews, there are a couple of questions that you may ask me, and you may not like my answers. 

First, if you ask me what my greatest weakness is, I may blank for a minute. You see, in school, we are not taught to recognize our own faults, but to press on and build on the good. We are taught to continuously evolve ourselves. And sometimes our mental image of how we see ourselves, is for lack of a better term, flawed. 

My answer to your question could be that I am a bit sarcastic- unfortunately you will most likely wince at that. No one likes a sarcastic person in the office. My answer could also be that sometimes I don't think before I speak. Another wince and red pen to my name. My answer could be that I sometimes crack under the pressure and love a glass or two of wine at night. I could just see your face right now. But you know what? Maybe my greatest weakness is being human? Because everything I just mentioned is what makes us all humans. 

BUT don't worry, I won't use those answers. I promise. I need the job, remember. 
I will stick with the fact that I am not blessed in the area of public speaking, or in the ability to learn a second language. 

Second, the main question that always sticks out to me- "where do you see yourself in five years" tends to confuse me. And honestly, I know it may sound bad, but I really have a hard time trying to answer the question for you. 

You see, I struggle with finding the answer, because I literally have no idea where I see myself in five years, and I don't see a thing wrong with that. But if you must have an answer, I have three options to go with:

Option #1: I could kiss your ass and tell you that I would like to be going on my fifth year of employment within your company, and in the process of working up that ladder of success; but in all honesty, I can't tell you that. It's too cheesy, and make me sound like a kiss ass, which I'm not. Well, unless that is actually the answer that you are definitely looking for and I will get the job because of if, then by all means, I will give it to you. 

Option #2: I could tell you that I would like to be in a house, in a career that I love, with another child, in a happy marriage, and making a dent in my student loan debt... but I really doubt you want to hear all that. How do I know this? Because once I start talking about houses and paying off debt, most interviewers stop me, and tell me that they are looking for a professional answer. 

Option #3: I could tell you that I have no idea. Which in turn will make me look like I have no drive to be successful in life. 

So my question to you is: what exactly do you want in the form of an answer? What are you looking for, because it seems to be the number one question that is always asked. 

So I guess I will say that in five years, I would like to be in a successful position, comfortable in my personal life, happy, and working on my second language learning skills, if we ever meet.  

What's that you say? The position requires public speaking in Spanish?
Shall I just leave now?

The girl who apparently cares more about a house then career. 

*linking up with Anne

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  1. I love this bc it is so TRUE! Well written and you nailed sit on the head!

  2. I hate those questions. Like... honestly I really want this job because I need the money and I feel like I can do the work you expect from me. That's the answer I want to give. But employers want some BS fluff crap that isn't completely true. I mean, seriously why does it matter so much to them?

  3. yes, yes and yes. ugh. I hate interviews. why do we have to display our weaknesses and turn them around to be a positive? I've missed your little space!

  4. I always get tripped up on "Do you have any questions for me/us?" I brainstorm before the interview, but they usually cover everything! And I doubt I'm allowed to ask, "So are you gonna hire me or what?" Lol

  5. Thank you hun! I have been on so many interviews, and the questions are all the same! I wish I could just hand them a paper with my answers lol

  6. Gosh, I wish that was answer! And it's the one that I want to give too! It's always like- why do you want to work for us? Um... because you're hiring AND pay REALLY good?

  7. It's so nice to see your pic in my comments again! :) btw, I am sending you a nice lil card! Anyways, I don't get it- I wish I could just tell them that I am super amazing, and I will be a good employee, so just pay me!

  8. Oh man, that's another question I hate! I never know if I should ask about dress code, requesting off, or anything like that. Sure it's something I need to know, but I guess it would be more acceptable to ask after they offer me the job?

  9. I'm on the other side of the spectrum. I have several open posiitons on my team that I'm hiring for and have had crappy after crappier interviewee. I don't ask the weakness question because I think it's dumb. I do ask the 5 year question because I genuinely want to know where someone wants to be. If they have aspirations to move up and on, that's awesome, if they're happy to be in the same place, that's awesome too. I just want someone to be honst with me while I evaluate their ability to not only do the job but fit in with the existing people on the team.

  10. This was very entertaining. Those interview questions are painfully phony, aren't they?


  11. Great post! I always hate the "what is your weakness" question because it's almost like a trick question :-)


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